Remember these Truths: ED and Body Image Issues & Truths that Give Freedom

If you’ve ever struggled with an ED or really just lived through middle school, you most likely haven’t liked certain areas of your body. Or maybe you’ve had people call you fat. Or maybe you’ve felt like left out of things and in turn, questioned your worth which led you to question your weight. Regardless of how ED’s start or how body image struggles begin, they do, often begin and if not kept in check flourish into full blown battles.

It all started when I was in middle school and felt awkward in my changing body. I didn’t like how I felt, I felt clumsy, not coordinated, and just kind of ‘frumpy.’ I took those insecurities, looked myself in the mirror and tried to figure out what was wrong. What was wrong with me? Why didn’t I feel like I fit in? Was it something I could control? Was it something I could fix? I guess I could lose weight. I wonder if I lost 10 pounds or so if I would be beautiful. If people would like me. If they would then accept me. And I would feel better about myself.

And so I slipped down the slippery slope of body image and eating disorder struggles and the full blown war waged deep within my heart. And I kept it a secret, for a while. Until it became too noticeable and then people began to ask, some with compassion and other’s with flippant, hurting remarks. And in the midst and the depth of this battle for my heart, Jesus slowly, quietly, starting reminded me of just who I am, whose I was, and what HE saw when he saw me.

For a while, when I looked in the mirror, all I saw was an awkward girl with some pretty nasty acne > hello hormones. And then once I ‘woke up,’ from my ED, all I then saw from was an emaciated, scary skinny woman who looked like a girl. And seeing either image broke me. And yet in the depths of that brokenness, Jesus reminded me that He makes all things beautiful in His time and He restores beauty out of ashes.

And so began the beautiful, redemptive battle for my heart and soul. I sat and basked in Jesus’ presence, I journaled truths I found in Scripture and mediated on the promises of God. And slowly, but surely, the scales over my eyes fell off and I began to see how He saw me – valued, priceless, beautiful and unique. Not because of who I was, but because of whose I was.

Now, five years later, I still need to mediate on those same truths that that broken girl found in Scripture so many years before. Because, here’s a little secret > ED and body image struggles definitely can be conquered, but I am always guarding my heart and mind against the lies that the enemy wants me to believe about myself, my body, and my worth. And in turn, I marinate myself in truth, so that when those lies do come and when I am tempted to have negative thoughts about my body image, my weight, my whatever, I can run back to the truths in Scripture and the promises of God and wage war against that lie my heart so readily wants to accept.

First, I remember that I am made, formed, and loved by the King of all Kings. If you are a believer – take heart and be of good courage > you are designed, created, formed and made by the maker of the Universe. You were and are loved, set apart and created for good works He has prepared for you.

Next, I think about how Jesus rejoices over me > isn’t that the most beautiful verse ever? “The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.” Zephaniah 3:17  If you are struggling with feeling unworthy, unlovable, look at this verse > God REJOICES over you. He sings about you. Feel that love and know that His love doesn’t depend on what you look like, your weight, your size, etc. 

A few other verses I clung to during those dark days, were “You are altogether beautiful my darling, and there is no flaw in you.” This is Solomon talking to his bride, but if we are Christ’s we are his bride – the church. And he sees Jesus’ righteousness when he looks at us. He has indeed made us lovely. And my (and your) worth doesn’t come from your pant size, but in who you are. Who God made you to be.

There are so many verses in the Bible that speak to the truth of how God sees his children > cling to those. Cling to the fact that you are loved, honored, set apart, valued, priceless, worth more than many sparrows, forgiven, redeemed, and restored. And when those lies and fears and doubts come to plague your mind > run to these truths. Wage war. Fight the good fight. And rejoice knowing that you are loved.