My Thoughts and Emotions on Basically Not Running Since the End of May…
It’s no secret that I’ve struggling with an injury for the past couple of months. And every single ounce of me wishes things were different. But the fact is that I got injured end of May and it is just taking a long time for my plantar plate strain to heal. Since I am not going to be doing any long distance races this fall (as planned) I decided to simply think of this as an ‘off season,’ until I officially heal and can come back strong whenever the next season begins.
Surprisingly, I am handling this a lot better than I thought I would have. And part of it is because I’ve finally come to grips with where I am at and able to see it as a season. I don’t know if you are like me, but usually when I get injured (and especially if it is an injury that takes longer to recovery from) I start feeling super dramatic and thinking, “THIS IS THE END.” “I WILL NEVER RECOVER FROM THIS.” When in reality, I will and it is just a season. A season that didn’t go as planned (and guess what, that happens for a lot of runners!) Something else that is helping is learning from other elite runners. I’ve been realizing that while, yes, they run a lot and train a majority of their year – they DO take breaks (sometimes planned and sometimes unplanned) and sometimes their breaks are short and sometimes long. If I have to take months off a running to get this injury healed, it won’t ruin me. I can come back stronger, I can learn, I can grow, and I can recover.
But, I will be honest, it is HARD. It is hard to see ‘everyone,’ else out there running and not being able to join. It is hard to not be where I hoped to be at this point this year. But, I am learning (over and over again) that this little setback in my training is just a tiny sliver in the entirety of my running career. I don’t need to freak out (repeat and repeat.)
Right now, I am contemplating what to do > my podiatrist gave me the green light to start running short miles (1-2 miles this week) and while I want to run, I am also a little nervous about how my plantar plate will do. So, I am ONLY going to do 1-2 miles until it feels 100% and if it flares up at all this week, I am cutting running on land out and going to the water. I’ve never done pool running before, but I am determined to stay/ gain aerobic fitness through this injury. Thankfully, we have a local pool that I will be able to hit up a couple times a week and the other times I am planning on either biking, elliptical (which is one of my least favorite things to do > any elliptical lovers out there. Help me get through this!) and continue with strength/cross training/injury prevention stuff.
Honestly, it is harder for me to stay motivated with my athletic pursuits when I can’t run and years before, I have let my fitness slack when I get injured. BUT this time around, I am determined to do things differently. A couple years ago, when I had a really bad case of shin splints, I really let my fitness slack and didn’t continue pursuing my goals with as much passion as pre-injury. I think some of that was a lack of knowledge and some of it was a lack of motivation. This injury ‘cycle,’ I almost feel like it is the opposite. I’m so hungry and motivated and determined to come back stronger, almost as a way to prove to myself that this won’t defeat me. And, yes, there are days that I feel less motivated to do strength training than I would if I was doing a 8 mile run. BUT, I know that all the strength training, the pool running, the injury prevention routines, it will help me to come back to my training season, stronger, less injury prone, and more motivated than ever.
I’m also, ultimately, resting in the fact that God is sovereign and His ways are higher than mine. And I trust Him. I know He is using (and has used) this season to continue to shape me, grow me, and learn to depend on Him more. Self-sufficiency is such an easy thing to fall into and I know that as a type A, runner, wanna be super wife and mom, and coach, I can fall into the trap of self-reliance. Jesus has used this injury plus the crazy season of moving cities and Landon’s new job to reveal to me, so gently, my deep, literal need for Him, on a daily, hourly, basis. I can’t run on my own. I can’t keep a spotless home on my own. I can’t be an amazing wife and mom on my own. It’s through His strength that I can do any of this. And I can glory in that.
So yes, I don’t know exactly when this season will end and when my next training season will begin. But, I do know that I will continue to practice what I know to do (cross train, strength train, swim, pool run, injury prevention routines, cross fit, etc.) and be ready for when that day comes. It may not be tomorrow, but my goal is to act like it is. Stay hungry, stay humble, and to be ready for the training season.